Not just a link bait headline. Well, maybe it is. Ever heard of the “alpha uterus”? No? It might sound like the cheesy title of a thriller movie flick, but it’s not— it’s a quirky theory about period syncing.
I just discovered something amazing from one of the world’s leading neuroscientists, Dr Tara Swart. Turns out, studies have shown that period syncing among women in close quarters is orchestrated by the alpha female in the crew. She’s the menstrual maestro. The alpha uterus has a “strong hormonal pull that causes other cycles around it to menstruate in unison.
For the girls, it’s likely you’ve experienced period syncing. Whether it’s with your housemate, close friend, sister, or colleague. From my own experience, the conversation usually goes this way, “I have cramps today because of my period” to which my roommate replies with excitement “I am on my period too!”
The alpha uterus is a tangible metaphor of hierarchy being a natural human phenomenon.
Imagine tuning into an Instagram reel where a woman spills the beans on marriage secrets. She drops a bombshell: “Submit to your man, let him lead, and watch your happiness soar.” Surprisingly, the comment section lit up with women feeling triggered by this advice. It got me thinking, do they prefer leading and having their man submit?
It’s a head-scratcher for me. I can almost hear someone saying, “Can’t we just coexist equally without anyone submitting?” Well, for those championing pure equality, I hate to burst the bubble, but it might be a bit of a pipe dream. Why? Equality is a fallacy. There’s no system without hierarchy, look around.
From the innocent days of kindergarten to secondary school, there’s always been a class prefect, even among tiny tots. Fast forward to the university, the hostels you called home – leaders emerge everywhere. Let us step into the professional world, show me someone with a regular job who doesn’t answer to at least one person. Even as an entrepreneur, you’ve got mentors in your industry and a team looking up to you.
Let’s face it; I’m yet to stumble upon a system or organization without a structural organogram. In fact, whether you’re in the corporate arena or in your everyday mundane relationships with friends, hierarchy exists. While the more significant person in your friendship group might not be etched in stone like in the workplace or marriage, there’s always that person who has more prominence among the pair or group, either because of their wisdom, wealth, status or age.
In any institution with two or more individuals, a natural dynamic unfolds – there’s the leader(s) and the led. The marriage institution isn’t an exception, if it’s not the man taking the lead, then it’s inevitably the woman. If you’re running a home without any hierarchy, then you’re running an institution that is dangerously out of order.
Let’s take a closer look at the concept of leadership – being led or having a hierarchical relation isn’t a bad thing. Neither is it a societal construct like some people argue, it’s an innate survival superpower for all of mankind and non-human primates, which serves an adaptive function that benefits the group as a whole. It simply is just that.
From childhood sports competitions and spelling bees, to grade point averages and prom kings and queens, we learn early in life to view our social world in terms of who is better, smarter, or more favoured than everyone else. Even as adults, we are quick to identify status symbols such as foreign cars, big houses, and career titles. Because understanding where we stand relative to others is essential for defining social roles and promoting successful social interaction. And that sensitivity to status information is present early in life. It exist to ensure order and manage chaos. Hierarchy is an efficient way to maximize group cohesion and productivity. And the ability to readily perceive status cues in others is an important social skill.
The hiccup many women face with letting someone take the lead often stems from a lack of positive leadership examples. It’s not that being led is terrible. The snag lies in having experienced leadership from someone who was harsh, cruel, and unkind – someone who used their position at home to cause emotional distress. That’s where the distaste originates. And unfortunately, a lot of people only view submission through their trauma lenses.
What strikes me as odd is that, whether you’re a woman or not, as long as you are a functioning human being, you are currently submitting to some form of leadership/authority. Be it your religious leader, a pastor, your boss at work, or even your landlord. Surprisingly, some prefer submitting to these figures of authority over the person they claim to love, respect, befriend for life, and build a family with.
The next time the suggestion to submit to your man’s leadership triggers you, it’s worth taking a moment to reflect. Have a heart-to-heart with yourself to uncover why the idea of submitting to your partner makes you uncomfortable. Perhaps there are lingering demons from past trauma that need addressing. The real issue isn’t about being led sis; it’s about the person you choose to lead you.
Finally, I want to emphasize the profound importance in selecting a kind hearted partner. When you experience genuine love and protection from a man with a heart devoted to God, the impact on your life is profound. You willingly submit to such a partner. It’s empowering to have someone trustworthy at the helm of your home.
