David made ordinary people look extraordinary. He possessed an unassuming appearance – at 33, of average height, with a touch of extra weight and receding hairline. His education extended only to a year and a half of medical school after dropping out of university of Nigeria Nsuka to follow his passion of repairing cars, devoid of notable achievements in sports, the arts, or any other tangible facet of human excellence. He lived in a two-bedroom apartment in Ikeja with a secondary school buddy, drove a Peugeot 406 , managed a small auto parts distribution company, watched a lot of TV, and had dinner with his mom who lived in Ikorodu every Sunday evenings. There wasn’t a single thing that…oops, maybe one thing did set David apart from other young men in similar circumstances. He regularly attended Sunday mass.
“David, let’s get going! At times, the bustling scene at Victor’s reaches such a fervour that its doors are forced shut! And we need to beat this Friday traffic”
Victor’s, a renowned nightclub nestled in the heart of Ikeja, served as a customary destination for men embarking on the pursuit of love, or perhaps, seeking rewarding companionship, or even, in the case of many, succumbing to the transient gratification of primal desires, void of any meaningful connection.
However, amidst the rarity of genuine love connection among the patrons of Victor’s, David steadfastly held onto this aspiration wherever he went. His sole ambition in life revolved around discovering a true love story akin to that of Joke and Olu Jacobs, and dedicating his days to being a faithful husband and a caring father.
……………..
“I often question our choice of coming to places like this, Sols. We’ve had no luck, countless times. Besides, the noise in here is overwhelming.”
In settings like bars and nightclubs, an unspoken hierarchy subtly dictates the interactions. It may appear harsh, but everyone present is subconsciously guided by certain standards and expectations. And patrons stay in their lanes. It’s a simple reality: a person who may be deemed a “two” in attractiveness doesn’t typically pursue someone who’s a “ten,” nor does a “ten” readily entertain the advances of a “two.” You catch my drift. It’s rather straightforward to distinguish between those who fall within the range of “one” to “three” and those who belong to the enticing realm of “eight” to “ten.” It’s the in-between space, encompassing individuals labelled as “fours” to “six,” where the majority of people find themselves.
If we were to conduct a “Family Feud” survey, David would comfortably fit into that middle category. Like many men, David preferred to focus his romantic pursuits within a familiar range; aiming too high in matters of love can lead to disappointment, as you don’t want to exceed what you can handle. However, this particular night held a distinct quality.
“David? David, are you alright?”
“Hmm, yeah, I’m alright.”
“Alright”? In truth, he was utterly smitten. His gaze remained fixed on the most stunning girl he had ever seen.
Mary was undoubtedly a perfect ten, blessed with rare, effortless beauty. She had turned down countless advances from men, more times that you could shake an iPhone at or ants at a picnic—whichever analogy you’re more familiar with.
“Mary, why didn’t you dance with that guy? He’s cute!”
“I think the gold chain put me off. It just seemed fake.”
“But you’re not planning to marry the guy, not tonight at least. We’re just here to have some fun.”
“I’m having fun just watching all of you!”
“Mary, Prince Charming won’t come knocking on your door. You have to get out there and mingle.”
“Mingle, schmingle. I’m perfectly fine as I am.”
…………….
“Forget it, David.”
“Forget what?”
“The stunning lady you were gazing at.”
“God, she’s incredibly beautiful.”
“That’s the good part. The not-so-good part is that she’s not someone who would typically go for guys like us. You need to readjust your expectations.”
“I know.”
He understood, but he couldn’t. His eyes were drawn to her like Eko needs moimoi. He couldn’t tear his gaze away from her.
“Alright, David, why don’t you put yourself out of this torment and approach her for a dance? Face rejection and move on… or downward, if you catch my drift.”
“Very funny.”
Sit here and hope, or take action. David, your chances with landing that hottie are about as likely as Tiwa Savage coming by and serenading you with love songs. It’s futile, my friend. Adjust your mind set and go out there to explore other possibilities. I’m heading out on a reconnaissance mission right now.”
David understood that Solomon spoke the truth; the person he longed for seemed unattainable, just as Solomon had claimed. Hopeless… Hopeless… Hopeless. Hold on a moment, like a student at a Catholic school! It dawned on him. There are no causes without hope. There is always a glimmer of hope. And who better to turn to than St. Jude, the Patron Saint of seemingly impossible causes? The circumstances weren’t perfect, but prayers have no specific Launchpad. David decided to give it a try.
Dear St. Jude, I need to ask you a favour, actually a rather significant one. You see, I struggle when it comes to interacting with women, and tonight, I encountered a girl whom I truly desire to meet, engage in conversation with, and get to know better. She possesses such exquisite beauty, and I wish you could witness it for yourself. Perhaps you already have the ability to see her. Nevertheless, given that I am a regular attendee of the church, faithfully present every Sunday, I can provide you with my annual contribution statement if you require proof. My hope is that you could assist me in catching her attention, making her see beyond my nerdy appearance, if you comprehend my intention. I firmly believe that if anyone could help me win the affection of a woman like her, it would undoubtedly be you. I am uncertain if you possess the ability to bestow courage as well, but it would be immensely appreciated if you could offer me a dash of it. Thank you kindly. I will be grateful for any assistance you can provide.
Victor’s surroundings remained unchanged. The loud music persisted, bodies swayed on the dance floor, and Mary, undisturbed, gently stirred her drink. However, we, as mere mortals, are unaware of the happenings above. There is no requirement for thunder and lightning to signify activity in the realms beyond our reach.
……………
Even in heaven, there are moments of tranquillity. St. Jude relaxed after another exhausting day, tirelessly trying to inspire hope in other overwhelmed Nigerians. Like doctors, saints must remain be on call 24/7, ready to assist in times of urgency.
Although David’s plea didn’t qualify as an emergency, St. Jude was moved by the sincerity in his tone and the desperation in his voice. He took a glance and observed David and Mary sitting in the club, understanding the nature of their predicament. It was evident why David felt his situation was hopeless.
When it came to matters of the heart, St. Jude often sought the guidance and support of St. Valentine.
“Hey, Val, it’s Jude.”
“What on earth, it’s almost eleven o’clock. You woke me up!”
“Apologies, but I just received a call from a distressed man. I believe I’ll need your assistance with this one.”
“Ah, my brother, I’m completely exhausted. Today was quite eventful… I had to persuade a young couple about to enter the university that they didn’t need to explore other relationships, attempt to salvage two marriages hanging by a thread, keep an eye on all the nonsense happening on those blasted dating sites, and remind husbands about important birthdays and anniversaries. Can’t it all wait until tomorrow?”
“Well, my friend, it’s all part of the job we committed ourselves to, isn’t it?”
………..
“Mary, did you notice that strange person who has been giving you intense stares throughout the entire evening?”
“I suppose you’re referring to the gentleman in the shirt with the checkered pattern?”
“Yes, that’s the one. It seems you have your very own devoted follower.”
“Well, labelling him as a ‘weirdo’ may not be kind. Perhaps ‘nerdy’ is a more fitting description.”
……………..
“It seems you are still consumed by thoughts about the young lady wearing the captivating blue top.”
“I am utterly helpless. There is an inexplicable magnetism she possesses. And I have a glimmer of hope that progress is being made.”
“What on earth could possibly lead you to believe such a thing?”
“She noticed my gaze directed towards her.”
“And… please don’t tell me she responded with a smile.”
“Not precisely.”
“Then why do you find this reason for encouragement?”
“She did not hastily divert her gaze.”
“Oh, my goodness.” Solomon slapped his forehead with his palm
………….
“Alright, Jude, let’s examine the situation you’ve presented.”
“It involves the guy in the checkered shirt, Val. His name is David. The girl, Mary, is the one wearing the blue top near the stage.”
“You can’t be serious.”
“What do you mean?”
“You expect me to make that girl develop feelings for that guy? You must be out of your mind.”
“I know he’s no Regé-Jean Page, but he’s not terribly unattractive.”
“Jude, that girl is a perfect ten, and your Romeo is barely a two, maybe a three at best. He should have an ‘L’ for loser stamped on his forehead. There’s only so much I can do. Sorry, buddy.”
“Come on, Val, you have to give it a try. The guy sounded so desperate. I genuinely feel sorry for him.”
“You don’t need someone who can influence or persuade; you need a genuine miracle.”
“Have you watched ‘The Princess Bride’?”
“Of course.”
“Well, I have this feeling about David. If Mary could see his true character, his inner qualities, we might have something extraordinary. I’m talking about true love, Val. This is an opportunity you should seize.”
Val sighed deeply and lowered his head.
“Yes, I remember it. It’s the essence of life itself. Alright, I’ll see what I can do.”
“Oh my goodness, Mary. I just saw you looking at that socially awkward person!”
“No, I didn’t!”
“Yes, you did.”
Val was working his magic.
………..:
“Let’s leave this venue, David. Maybe we’ll have better luck at another place.”
“Yeah, you’re right, Sols. I’m ready to go.”
……………
“What in the world, Jude?! I managed to make her notice this geek, and now your guy is running away! I thought you were supposed to convince him that there’s hope. Did you wake me up for this?”
“Oh no! I’ll take care of it!”
…………..
“Hold on, Sols. Other places might be even worse than this place. Maybe we should have one more beer.”
“I know what you’re trying to do, partner, but alright, one more beer.”
…………..
“Haha, Mr. Smarty-pants! Jude still has the magic touch. My guy will never give up! I’m doing my part, Val. You just have to make her see the truth.”
“More like give her a brain transplant.” Val mocked.
…………..
David’s gaze remained fixed on his beer, while his mind wandered through the routine of his life – shuffling auto parts, indulging in Iya Oyo’s Amala and Ewedu, sipping beer, lounging in front of the TV with Solomon, and frequenting the bars. It felt like a never-ending repetition.
Yet, deep within, David could envision it, he could sense it – a vision of a little child eagerly leaping into his arms upon his return from work, planting delicate flowers alongside their humble abode, and simply finding solace in the presence of the woman he adored.
……………
Mary was exhausted from swirling that tiny drink stirrer. She radiated beauty, attracting everyone’s attention as she sat amidst a crowd of friends in a vibrant venue filled with hundreds of merry partygoers. However, despite the lively atmosphere, she felt a profound sense of loneliness.
…………
“How’s it going, Val?”
“I’ve made progress. She’s deep in thought, contemplating her life, realizing that she’s not where she desires to be, and starting to envision a better future. But David? Convincing her to fall for him will be quite challenging.”
“You can only do your best.”
“How’s his mind set, Jude?”
“Don’t worry about my guy. He’ll never give up. I’ve instilled in him more hope and determination than I did for Inigo Montoya.”
“Who’s Inigo Montoya?”
“I thought you said you watched the movie.”
…………
The atmosphere at Victor’s that night was charged with a certain energy. Even the patrons could sense it. Solomon was energetically dancing in the midst of the crowd when time seemed to slow down. He abruptly paused, surveying the room, shifting his gaze between David and the captivating girl in the blue top. In his mind, their images drew closer, for a moment, he thought they were almost merging side by side.
…………..
“Okay, Val, I’ve got her contemplating beyond the surface, you know, all that talk about beauty being more than skin deep, that what really matters is what’s inside, you know, the usual stuff.”
“Good job, Val. My guy is hanging tough. You know, what you just said reminds me of something.”
“What’s that, Jude?”
“Well, she’s clearly beautiful on the outside. I hope she’s equally wonderful on the inside. You know, sometimes the pretty ones can be quite difficult.”
“Don’t worry, she’s great. I investigate these things before bringing two people together. I’m not foolish, Jude.”
“Apologies, Val.”
…………..
St. Jude and St. Valentine could influence people, but they had no control over time. Closing hour was approaching.
“What do you say, David? Let’s leave before the parking lot gets crowded.”
“I guess. I’m ready to go.”
……….
“You’re running out of time, Jude.”
“Get Mary ready. I’ll boost David’s courage to the max. He’ll have more determination than Rooster Cogburn!”
“I liked that movie.”
…………
“Ready, Mary? Let’s go.”
Mary’s limbs suddenly felt heavy, as if submerged in thick syrup. Slowly, she rose from her seat, stealing one last glance at the guy in the checkered shirt. Her mind drifted, transporting her to peculiar places. She envisioned David helping a young child with a tee-ball, the two of them emerging from a church on a Sunday morning, sitting together on a porch swing, and an older version of themselves strolling hand in hand down a grocery store aisle.
“Mary, are you coming?”
David moved across the dance floor in a daze. He was a tightly wound spring ready to take action. It was now or never, David. It’s show time .
He turned back to the table where he had been watching the girl in the blue top all evening. The table was empty, and the girl of his dreams was gone. In a state of panic, he scanned the room. Mary was making her way towards the exit, blending in with the crowd. Her friends were oblivious, but she stole a few quick glances back towards the dance floor as she reached the door.
………….
“Do something, Jude! We’re losing them!”
Some refer to it as “The Shriek,” while others call it “The Scream.” No band that had ever played at Victor’s could compare to the decibel levels David reached that night.
“Wait!!”
Solomon’s eyes nearly popped out of his head as everyone froze and turned to see a man in a checkered shirt flailing his arms.
“There! How’s that for determination?! Your turn, Val.”
“I’m working on it.”
Mary was stunned. She knew. The cry was meant for her. A sense of calm enveloped her as David fought his way through the bewildered crowd to reach her. He paid no mind to the curious onlookers.
“Excuse me… I… I’m so sorry to bother you… I know I… but I just had to…”
Mary smiled.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to explain. My name is Mary.”
Mary reached out her hand, and David, breathless, grasped it in his.
“Look at them, Jude. They’re out shopping and still holding hands after these years.
